I don’t usually talk about feelings, because in my opinion talking about feelings on a blog usually comes across as a form of emotional blackmail. I don’t want to bully people who read this into feeling a certain way I set them up to feel; and most importantly of all, we are all entitled to feelings and so what happens when a certain feud arises precisely out of conflicting subjective feelings? No one gets away unscathed.
So what happened is that recently my friends got upset with each other, which makes me upset as well. Not because I’m blaming myself or anything, but because it has made me realised how cynical and monstrous I am when it comes to matters of this sort. I start mincing words and going for the logical. Which, as it must happen, does not solve the problem a single bit. In fact it makes things worse – for me to logically say that we all deserve to be, and have the right to be selfish and demanding sounds so wrong in this context. To say that, hey, I still care hence I am possessive doesn’t come out right either. I just somehow lost the ability to deal with feelings over the past few years. Not only that, I can’t offer a single bloody good advice for cause of action this time round.
Wow I wrote that blogging about feelings is emotional blackmail. That in itself is antithesis of what I hoped to be a more amicable post of some sort. I just accused people of emotional blackmail, how cruel can I get? Yet I ask, is it wrong for me to have an opinion? Does it make it any more acceptable if I couch it as a “feeling”?
[ Gee. My split personality other half just accused me of not only being insensitive, but doing grand gestures of questioning motive and soundness of premise like an academic old fart when I should be focussing more on how people truly feel. Tell you what, my dear split personality other half - f.u.c.k.y.o.u. Well, I digress.]
But on the same train of thought – is a feeling less a feeling if it’s factual? Like, I feel angry at Spongebob because he is being an idiot for still sticking with Patrick regardless of all the nasty things Patrick has done. Is that still a feeling now that I might have articulated my exact factual reasons for being angry?
Tough questions, I know. I am pretty good at diverting attention away from the issue at hand. Frankly, I don’t want to confront the issue at hand because I know we’d invariably come out hurt, angry or both. Yet it seems like an issue that requires attending to. So what really happens when everyone is entitled to have feelings, and everyone has factual reasons to feel the way they feel? Where do we go from there?
The funny thing is one party decides to air dirty laundry in public, and probably air dirty laundry to significant others before clearing the air. When problems are told to other people apart from the parties involved it's a downhill journey from there.